Lovers & Friends : The Fcuk Buddy System

Interesting topic. I know. Another culture norm that's been around for quite some time.

The F*** Buddy System is based on the pretense that two people can have sex with no strings attached and no feelings (aside from lust) involved. It's supposed to be mutual and fail proof since you're free to do what and whom you want. 

But is it really?

I've never been too comfortable with the system. However, I do understand it as a culture and societal norm. It's in the movies, the music you listen to, your friends do it, it's just everywhere. You can't deny the fact that it sounds amazing to have a mutual agreement where both parties can have sex and not worry about the pressures of building a relationship, and can in fact, be friends! There's just one little thing we all tend to forget though.


You can deny it all you want. But if he/she has some good sex, it's highly possible that the physical part of you will tap into the mental/emotional part of you. In some cases you become possessive. Possessive in either wanting that person exclusively, or possessive in wanting that person to always be available when you want the take down. You don't even realize that this is a form of attachment to a situation that originally began with no strings attached. Hey, if you're a pro and can have and leave a f*** buddy with no issues, kudos to you. I always find that eventually you do find that one person you may want more from. 

They say women are ones who get attached. But I know quite a few guys who get attached. Here are a few ways you know someone has jumped over the line:

1. You or they get mad at you if you're with another person/boo/buddy.

2. Confessing true feelings about one another.

3. They constantly sleep or want you to sleep over.

4. You or they get mad at the pettiest things.

5. Communication is constant; i.e. constant phone calls, texts, etc.

They're obviously more, but these are the biggest signs I've seen/experienced.

Why do we tolerate this system if our end goal is to find that special person to just chill with for as long as we can? Everyone is entitled to do as they please, but sometimes it's better to take the time to know and learn about yourself. Prepare yourself for the right person and for when they finally come along. Find someone who respects you as much as they want to sleep with you because let's face it, sexual attraction is unavoidable. Find someone who wants to make you their girlfriend/boyfriend (maybe eventually more). The point of it all is to find someone who yes, wants to sex the hell out of you, but wants to claim you as theirs and make a mutual agreement about each other and not just about the sex. Being Lovers and Friends is tempting, but is it honestly worth it?