How Many of Us Have Them?

Constant evolution is mandatory in life. Every decision you make should be for the betterment of oneself. We evaluate our jobs, our futures, our partners, our living areas, etc. So then why is it so hard to truly re-evaluate who your friends are? Why do we hesitate when it comes to separating ourselves from people who we developed relationships with, but have become poisonous? What makes us so scared to want to be better in this one area of life?

Throughout the years, we develop relationships with people based on who we are, or what we reflect at the moment. Sometimes we are able to relate to one another beyond what is seen on the surface. I can honestly say that 95% of the friends I made 10-15 years ago, are complete strangers to me now. Yes, disassociating yourself can and will feel strange, but most people have forgotten how necessary this is.

Story time.

So I have a friend...we'll call him Dennis. His parents would send him to schools outside of his neighborhood. In school, he didn't get the best grades, but they were good enough to make his parents proud. He loved sports and played on every team for every season. He had his school friends and he had his boys: you know, the neighborhood, "around the way" friends. Dennis went to college, came back, and was labeled as "the n**** who changed." Long story short, in an effort to prove he was still "down" he hung around the wrong crowd and ended up serving time for a crime where he was in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong friends. He's teaching his kids to do better. 

I know what some of you are thinking. "Loyalty." But where were his friends' loyalty to Dennis when it came to knowing that he was trying to be a better person? There are signs, experiences, and stories we have all heard and been through that show us we need to keep a careful eye not only on who we are becoming, but who those around us are becoming as well.

I have lost friendships that I was once sad about. But in order for you to grow, you must shed dead leaves. There are friends that no matter how much time passes, you are still close; you're just working on being better people. There are friends who you keep at a distance, pray for, yet you spend a minimal amount of time with (These people are probably on their way to the chopping block). Then there are people who you no longer have a relationship with because it is deemed necessary. 

Count yourself, your time, and who you are as VALUABLE.  Make the necessary changes in life in order to achieve your goals. Allow yourself to grow and be unapologetic in that endeavor. Take into consideration that it is OK to not be the same person you were years ago. Prosperity is what we all hope to find at the finish line.